People need to learn who He truly is.

December 23, 2009. - 6:37 PM

I remember about 4 years ago, I was looking at Bo Sanchez' face, a very amazing preacher, very amazing mentor and has founded the Light of Jesus Community that is now all around the world. I was staring at him and I was telling myself, promised myself and asked God to help me be like him in a matter of 5 years.

I am 17 now, 4 years ago, I would be 13 and I can surely say that I was very naive. To say something like that without even thinking of what it really means. And I forced myself in the spotlight, as a matter of attention. To be praised, to be thought of someone that is good, my ego and pride. His presence to me, was only like a drug, to overcome my own anxieties and make myself feel "good". I used Him as a placebo to make myself better and at the same time, make myself feel bad.

An addictive attitude that I truly kept and has abused quite a few things in my life. It's hard and painful. And slowly but surely, I was strayed away. Finding any means necessary to get over myself, justifying my actions by doubting God and finding as many reasons possible, to procrastinate dealing with things and finding reasons not to believe God.

But God is not the question, He is the answer.
God is love.

I think everyone needs God.

And finding Him is hard.